Attack Of The Quasars

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In girum imus nocte et consumimur igni

Up, up and awayyyy!

ware-hero-01

Με το υπερηρωϊκό λινκ της toomanytribbles σήμερα, μου ήρθαν στο μυαλό οι κλασσικές σκέψεις περί υπερδυνάμεων…

Δεν νομίζω πως έχει υπάρξει παιδάκι που να μην το έχει σκεφτεί!

Υπάρχουν κι αυτοί που μετακινούν την οπτική μας για τους υπερήρωες. Όπως ο λυρικός Chris Ware

ware-hero-02

Filed under: comics

Holy tribbles Batman! Did you see that!!?

Η γλυκειά κι απίστευτη toomanytribbles, έχει σήμερα ένα φοβερό λινκ!

Πατήστε ΕΔΩ και φτιάξτε έναν υπερήρωα ή μια υπερηρωΐδα!!! Τέλειο! ^__^

myhero01

Filed under: comics

Σουρεάλ όνειρα βιβλικού παχύδερμου

Έχω περιγράψει αρκετά από τα σουρεαλιστικά μου όνειρα εδώ κι εδώ. Αλλά μάλλον δεν πιάνουν μία μπροστά στο απιστευταπίθανο όνειρο του Βεεμώθ! Το παραθέτω φορ γιορ βιούινγκ πλέζουρ:

click to view the dream

click to view the dream

Προφανώς οι έξυπνοι άνθρωποι που κάνουν διατριβές, βλέπουν ακόμη πιο σουρεάλ όνειρα!

Filed under: comics, προσωπικές παράνοιες

Marvel 70

Filed under: comics

Παραπομπή

Διαβάστε όλη τη σειρά των τελευταίων ποστς στο μπλογκ του Δερβενιώτη.

Ειδικά το τελευταίο του ποστ είναι έπος.

Το μπουρδέλο καίγεται. Σώστε τις πουτάνες.

Filed under: comics, επικαιρότητα;

Χαριτωμένα παιδάκια VS επιβίωση

Είναι ωραίο ν’ ακούς / διαβάζεις αλήθειες.

Φυσικά, ο Bill τα λέει καλύτερα απ’ τον καθ’ ένα. Κάθε λέξη έχει νόημα. Βαρύτητα. Σημασία.

Enjoy:

“There’s too many fucking people in the world. Someone needs to say that by the way. Tired of this, “Hey hey aren’t we the coolest? Humans are so neat.”

Too many of yer. Quit rutting, just for a fucking day. Let’s work out this food/air deal. Then go back to your rutting. But I’ll tell you this. Where’s this idea that childbirth is a miracle came from? Ha, I missed that fucking meeting, okay?

“It’s a miracle, childbirth is a miracle.” No it’s not. No more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out of your ass. It’s a chemical reaction, that’s all it fucking is. If, you you wanna know what a miracle is: raisin’ a kid that doesn’t talk in a movie theatre. Okay, there, there, there is a goddam miracle. It’s not a miracle if every nine months any yin yang in the world can drop a litter of mewling cabbages on our planet.

And just in case you haven’t seen the single mom statistics lately, the miracle is spreading like wild-fire. “Hallelujah!” Trailer parks and council flats all over the world just filling up with little miracles. Thunk, thunk, thunk, like frogs laying eggs.

“Thunk, look at all my little miracles, thunk, filling up my trailer like a sardine can. Thunk. You know what would be a real miracle, if I could remember your daddy’s name, aargh, thunk. I guess I’ll have to call you Lorry Driver Junior. Thunk. That’s all I remember about your daddy was his fuzzy little pot-belly riding on top of me shooting his caffeine ridden semen into my belly to produce my little water-headed miracle baby, urgh. There’s your brother, Pizza Boy Delivery Junior.”

“Hallelujah!” Hold on for a minute, let’s figure out this food/air deal okay? Okay. I’m just weird, you know? How about have a neat world for kids to come to? Ha ha okay it’s me, fuck it. Drop ‘em like fucking flies, boom, just fill up the world with em. I just don’t get it you know, I mean I’m sorry man, you know kids are fine, just keep em away from me. Alright there, alright.

Now get this, I’ve been travelling all over the country on British Air. No smoking on British Air. Now let me get this straight: no smoking right but they allow children. Little fairness, huh?
“Well smoking bothers me.” Well guess what…

I was on this one flight right, I’m flying, I’m sleeping on the plane, I’m fucking “knackered”. Very tired right? and I feel this tapping on my head. And I look up and there’s this little kid – loose! on the fucking plane, he’s just loose. It’s his playground in the sky. And he has decided that his job is to repetitively tap me on the top of the head. I look across the aisle at his mom. She’s just smiling, you know. Guy next to the mom goes, “They’re so cute when they’re that small.”

Isn’t that amazing, letting your kid run loose on a fucking plane. And then the kid runs over to the emergency exit and he starts flipping that handle to the door. And the guy next to the mom starts to get up, and I go, “Wait a minute… we’re about to learn an important lesson right here.”

Kwoooshh.

Why you’re right, the smaller he gets, the cuter he is.
God, I wish I had a camera right now.
With a telescopic lens.
Like to get a picture of his face when his pudgy little legs hit that farmhouse down there.

Aah, aah, kids. Ha ha.

Stewardess, since we got a breeze in here can we smoke now? It’s fairly well circulated at this point. Woosh.”

Filed under: comics, προσωπικές παράνοιες

Εγώ

And that includes the “bumping-into-telephone-poles” thing…

this is actually me

this is actually me

Filed under: comics, προσωπικές παράνοιες

Garfield Minus Garfield

(my thanks to null)

O Τζον χωρίς τον Γκάρφιλντ είναι απλά ένας μοναχικός, τραγικός λούζερ.

Άσε που το στριπάκι δείχνει καλύτερο έτσι.

Garfield Minus Garfield by Dan Walsh

Filed under: comics

Μπλόγκινγκ!

Καλά τα λέει ο Rat!

Μπζζζζζζ…

xD

Filed under: comics

Όταν παίρνω δρόμο…

Αν εξαιρέσουμε τις μαθηματικές πράξεις, αυτό κάνω κι εγώ όταν περπατάω πηγαίνοντας κάπου.

Το πρόβλημα είναι όταν η ευθεία σου γραμμή διακόπτεται από 138 παρκαρισμένα αυτοκίνητα, τα γαμοκάγκελα του Αβραμόπουλου και λίμνες από περιστερό-/σκυλό-/γατό-σκατα.

(από το xkcd)

Filed under: comics, science freaktion

Μόαρ αμπάουτ Κουήνι!

Uncle Bill says:

People suck, and that's my contention. I can prove it on a scratch of paper with a pen. Give me a fucking Etch-a-sketch, I'll do it in three minutes. The proof, the fact, the factorum. I'll show my work, case closed. I'm tired of this back-slapping "aren't humanity neat?" bullshit. We're a virus with shoes, okay? That's all we are.

Ricky, Stephen and Karl

Ricky: What would you do, though, if you was swimming, right, it was a nice little thing... you're on holiday, right? And there's this octopus there, and you're goin' round, right? And you see it start spittin' at you, poison?
Karl: Yeah...
Ricky: What would you say?
Karl: ...well it's too late then, I'd kick it...and I'd say, "knob-'ead". But what's the point? What's the point in gettin' annoyed? 'Cause it's, it's done it's stuff, ennit?
Ricky: I like the way he's kickin' it and callin' it a "knob-'ead"! Under the water! What is this octopus thinking?! Ohh, God! Oh, G- I'd go, "You fuckin' eight-legged shit"...
Karl: Not bothered, I'm not bothered, I don't know why you're sayin'...
Ricky: ..."You fuckin'...fuckin' cunt of a mollusc"...
Karl: ...it'd just spit at you again, it's not bothered.
Ricky: ..."You slimy, little fuckin' boneless wanker"...
Stephen: Are you still talking to the octopus?

Norwegian Blue

A customer enters a pet shop. O: We're closin' for lunch. C: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique. O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it? C: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it! O: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting. C: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now. O: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage! C: The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead. O: Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting! C: All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up! (shouting at the cage)'Ello, Mister Polly Parrot! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show... (owner hits the cage) O: There, he moved! C: No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage! O: I never!! C: Yes, you did! O: I never, never did anything... C: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) 'ELLO POLLY!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o'clock alarm call! (Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.) C: Now that's what I call a dead parrot. O: No, no.....No, 'e's stunned! C: STUNNED?!? O: Yeah! You stunned him, just as he was wakin' up! Norwegian Blues stun easily, major. C: Um...now look...now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein' tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk. O: Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords. C: PININ' for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that?, look, why did he fall flat on his back the moment I got 'im home? O: The Norwegian Blue prefers keepin' on it's back! Remarkable bird, id'nit, squire? Lovely plumage! C: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there. (pause) O: Well, o'course it was nailed there! If I hadn't nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent 'em apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee! C: "VOOM"?!? Mate, this bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised! O: No no! 'E's pining! C: 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! -Monty Pythons

Χώρος για Καπνίζοντες

Ο χώρος αυτός είναι αφιερωμένος στο προστατευμένο είδος των Τσιγαρομανών. Οι πιπομανείς είναι δεκτοί. Οι πουρομανείς δεκτοί κατόπιν συστάσεως. Λευτεριά στους καταπιεσμένους καπνίζοντες!

Ντισκλέιμερ! (Άι χαζ ιτ!)

Το παρόν blog δεν έχει διάθεση ενημερωτική κι εγώ δεν θέλω να γίνω δημοσιογράφος στη θέση του δημοσιογράφου. Διατηρώ το δικαίωμά μου να εκφράζω τις υποκειμενικές μου απόψεις με τον τρόπο που μου αρέσει. Αν δεν σας αρέσει, πηγαίντε στο δίπλα μαγαζί. Γεμάτος ο τόπος από δαύτα είναι. Αναδημοσιεύστε ελεύθερα (αν βρείτε τίποτα της προκοπής) και διαβάστε ασύστολα (αν μπορέσετε να κρατήσετε τα μάτια σας ανοιχτά από τη βαρέμαρα). Αν βρείτε κάποιο λάθος ή ανακρίβεια, διορθώστε με. Γράφω γιατί δεν ξέρω πώς είναι να μην γράφω και γιατί μ' αρέσει το "τσίκιτσίκι" του πληκτρολογίου. Εντζόι.