Θες να μάθεις; « Attack Of The Quasars

Θες να μάθεις;

Ιουνίου 15, 2008 — 50ft queenie

AYTO EINAI TO BOYNTOY!

Έχω σχολιάσει πάλι στο παρελθόν, πως μου φαίνεται εξαιρετικά αστείος ο τρόπος που μερικοί άνθρωποι ψάχνουν κάποια πράγματα.

Παράδειγμα: Αν εσύ (πολυαγαπημένε μου αναγνώστη) ή εγώ, ψάχναμε πχ. τι είναι το βουντού, θα πηγαίναμε στη wiki και απλά θα γράφαμε “voodoo”. Απλό έτσι;

ΟΧΙ!

Κάποιοι απλά προτιμούν να πάνε στο google search τους και να πληκτρολογήσουν: “ΤΙ ΕΙΝΑΙ ΤΟ ΒΟΥΝΤΟΥ”…

Δεν είναι φοβερά αστείο αυτό το πράμα;;; (*insert uncomfortable silence where queenie is the only one laughing*)

Ένα μεγάλο συγγνώμη στους ανθρώπους που καταλήγουν να διαβάζουν τα κατεβατά μου, ενώ ψάχνουν να βρουν απλά μια απάντηση στο αιώνιο ερώτημα “ΤΙ ΕΙΝΑΙ ΤΟ ΒΟΥΝΤΟΥ”.

Αναρτήθηκε στις προσωπικές παράνοιες. 12 σχόλια »

Ντισκλέιμερ! (Άι χαζ ιτ!)

Το παρόν blog δεν έχει διάθεση ενημερωτική κι εγώ δεν θέλω να γίνω δημοσιογράφος στη θέση του δημοσιογράφου. Διατηρώ το δικαίωμά μου να εκφράζω τις υποκειμενικές μου απόψεις με τον τρόπο που μου αρέσει. Αν δεν σας αρέσει, πηγαίντε στο δίπλα μαγαζί. Γεμάτος ο τόπος από δαύτα είναι. Αναδημοσιεύστε ελεύθερα (αν βρείτε τίποτα της προκοπής) και διαβάστε ασύστολα (αν μπορέσετε να κρατήσετε τα μάτια σας ανοιχτά από τη βαρέμαρα). Αν βρείτε κάποιο λάθος ή ανακρίβεια, διορθώστε με. Γράφω γιατί δεν ξέρω πώς είναι να μην γράφω και γιατί μ' αρέσει το "τσίκιτσίκι" του πληκτρολογίου. Εντζόι.

Subject to change without notice

Fundamentalist Christianity - fascinating. These people actually believe that the world is 12 thousand years old. Swear to God. What the..? Based on what? I asked them. "Well we looked at all the people in the Bible and we added 'em up all the way back to Adam and Eve, their ages - 12 thousand years." Well how fucking scientific, okay. I didn't know that you'd gone to so much trouble. That's good. You believe the world's 12 thousand years old? "That's right." Okay I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready? "uh huh." Dinosaurs. If you know the world's 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, they existed in that time, you'd think it would have been mentioned in the fucking Bible at some point. "And lo Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus... with a splinter in his paw. And O the disciples did run a shriekin': 'What a big fucking lizard, Lord!' But Jesus was unafraid and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus's paw and the big lizard became his friend. And Jesus sent him to Scotland where he lived in a loch for O so many years inviting thousands of American tourists to bring their fat fucking families and their fat dollar bills. And oh Scotland did praise the Lord. Thank you Lord, thank you Lord. Thank you Lord." Get this, I actually asked one of these guys, OK, Dinosaurs fossils - how does that fit into you scheme of life? Let me sit down and strap in. He said, "Dinosaur fossils? God put those there to test our faith." Thank God I'm strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. You believe that? "uh huh." Does that trouble anyone here? The idea that God.. might be.. fuckin' with our heads? I have trouble sleeping with that knowledge. Some prankster God running around: "Hu hu ho. We will see who believes in me now, ha ha." [mimes God burying fossils] "I am God, I am a prankster." "I am killing Me." You know, You die and go to St. Peter... "Did you believe in dinosaurs?" "Well, yeah. There was fossils everywhere" Thuh [trapdoor opens] "Aaaaaaarhhh!" "You fuckin idiot." "Flying lizards, you're a moron. God was fuckin' with you!" "It seemed so plausible, ahhhh!" "Enjoy the lake of fire, fucker!" -Bill Hicks "Revelations"

Norwegian Blue

A customer enters a pet shop. O: We're closin' for lunch. C: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique. O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it? C: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it! O: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting. C: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now. O: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage! C: The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead. O: Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting! C: All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up! (shouting at the cage)'Ello, Mister Polly Parrot! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show... (owner hits the cage) O: There, he moved! C: No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage! O: I never!! C: Yes, you did! O: I never, never did anything... C: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) 'ELLO POLLY!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o'clock alarm call! (Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.) C: Now that's what I call a dead parrot. O: No, no.....No, 'e's stunned! C: STUNNED?!? O: Yeah! You stunned him, just as he was wakin' up! Norwegian Blues stun easily, major. C: Um...now look...now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein' tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk. O: Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords. C: PININ' for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that?, look, why did he fall flat on his back the moment I got 'im home? O: The Norwegian Blue prefers keepin' on it's back! Remarkable bird, id'nit, squire? Lovely plumage! C: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there. (pause) O: Well, o'course it was nailed there! If I hadn't nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent 'em apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee! C: "VOOM"?!? Mate, this bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised! O: No no! 'E's pining! C: 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! -Monty Pythons

Alex Says:
Ιουνίου 15, 2008 σε 19:09

Mas gurnas pisw sthn epoxh ths altavista :)

Απάντηση

50ft queenie Says:
Ιουνίου 16, 2008 σε 03:33

Εσάς μπορεί να σας γυρνάω. Εγώ δεν πάω πουθενά. Είναι γνωστόν ότι ανακάλυψα το ίντερνετ μόλις προχτές. Δεν ξέρω για τι πράμα μιλάς. Τσιντσαντσον.

Alex Says:
Ιουνίου 16, 2008 σε 04:15

O logos pou polloi grafoun tis fraseis pou les einai giati oi palies mhxanes anazhthshs (altavista,lycos,yahoo) htan prosanatolismenes sto na dexontai “logikes” erwthseis me suntaktiko. Ws ek toutou sthn periptwsh sou o 8uths ginetai 8uma :P Phges gia malli kai bghkes kouremenh (oxi oti se xalaei kiolas giati einai gnwsto to deviation sou me to konto malli). Kallio pente kai sto xeri para deka kai karterei. Kallio gaidourodene para gaidourogureue. Kallio einai mias wras eleu8erh zwh para saranta xronia sklabia kai fulakh. Seira sou :)

Kalio-40 Si-ei

50ft queenie Says:
Ιουνίου 16, 2008 σε 14:31

Kewl!

*Πίσω έχ’ η αχλάδα την ουρά;
*Όσα δεν φτάνει η αλεπού τα κάνει (”κρεμαστάρια” λέει; Δεν θυμάμαι. Και τι σκατά είναι τα κρεμαστάρια; Εγώ όταν ήμουνα μικρή νόμιζα ότι είναι τσαμπιά με σταφύλια.)
*Στου κουφού την πόρτα όσο θέλεις βρόντα;

Rayman Says:
Ιουνίου 18, 2008 σε 13:11

epakrivis metafora

Μπομπ Ρος ιστοσελίδα
ΒΙΝΤΕΟ ΦΟΤΟ ΜΕ ΣΕΞΙ 40Α
ΣΑΓΙΟΝΑΡΕΣ ΔΙΧΑΛΑ
Ντεμης με clash μπλουζα
ΓΑΜΗΣΙΑ ΑΠΟ ΤΟΝ ΠΕΠΛΟ
kanadas
πολυ μαρουλι εφαγα
video γυναικες να γδυνονται

Rayman Says:
Ιουνίου 18, 2008 σε 13:13

σπαμ σορρυ
Μου πήρε καμμιά 25 χρόνια να καταλάβω οτι δεν υπάρχει γυναίκα με την ιδιότητα Κρεμαστάρια και η οποία αναλαμβάνει να κάνει αυτά που δεν φτάνει η αλεπού.

50ft queenie Says:
Ιουνίου 18, 2008 σε 14:01

xD Εγώ δεν έχω βγάλει ακόμα άκρη σου λέω…

Όσο για τα search words… “Τρανσαμινάσες” και “ελληνίδες πουτάνες” είναι ολ τάιμ κλάσσικς εδώ. Τα άλλα είναι σουρρεαλιστικά και μένω συχνά να τα κοιτάω σα βλάκας…

Ωραία η λίστα σου πάντως!

Το “πολύ μαρούλι έφαγα”… γιατί να το ψάξει κάποιος δηλαδή;;!

Rayman Says:
Ιουνίου 18, 2008 σε 14:17

http://www.μπομπρος.com

50ft queenie Says:
Ιουνίου 18, 2008 σε 14:33

Πόσο θεός είναι ο Μπομπ btw…

Άι λοβ χιμ.

Rayman Says:
Ιουνίου 19, 2008 σε 10:33

isws isws yparxei ena prezaki kapou edw pou parakolouthei to dvd tou bob se mia vitrina sti stournari… a nato! eidate loipon me psos aplo tropo mporoume na dwsoume sto ergo mas ena tono unferground…

50ft queenie Says:
Ιουνίου 19, 2008 σε 13:45

Ακκααααακακκακαααακαρκαρκαρ!

Attack Of The Quasars

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